It's a brave, new world for Ryan...

Youchien 

ようちえん Graduation

After two years at Gekkouhara Youchien, it was time to take a moment to say good-bye to the friends, families, and teachers who had welcomed us with kindness and grace.  This was especially true for Sakamoto-sensei, also known as Atsuka-sensei.

It was also a time to reflect on how far Ryan has come in his 2 years in Japan.

Two years ago - Ryan at his youchien opening ceremony

And 2 years later... at youchien graduation.

Two years ago,
- Ryan could not speak a word of Japanese.  Today, he was loud and clear and vibrant and a very active and proud member of the youchien class.  He sang the loudest and accepted his "diploma" with gusto and precision (see below about the precision required).  People constantly comment on how much Ryan sounds like a native speaker - his pronunciation, mannerisms, choice of words.  This comment from others is often followed by chuckles of laughter at something they were surprised to hear come out of a little American boy's mouth.
- Ryan looked shy and nervous at the opening ceremony, and rightfully so.  Today, he smiled and laughed and was excited to be moving on to elementary school.  While others were sad and scared of leaving kindergarten, Ryan seemed happy to be on the brink of a new adventure.
- Ryan had to take both a fork/spoon and chopsticks to school for bento.  Today, he is a master of the chopsticks and even the other Japanese moms are impressed with his chopstick skills.  His youchien teachers get all the credit for that; we had nothing to do with it.

March 19, 2014 - Youchien Graduation Day

And then, there are some things that haven't changed at all in the last 2 years...  or maybe in the last 2 centuries...

Family roles:  At the youchien opening ceremony 2 years ago, Kevin and I were struck by the fact that the moms were all ushered into the front row and the dads basically had to just find a seat in the back somewhere.  As with much of what was happening around us during that time, we didn't really understand it, but we just played along.

At the youchien graduation ceremony, however, the symbolism seemed much more clear to me.  At the graduation information meetings, we learned that each child had 1 seat reserved at the front  - for the mother ONLY.  Again, the fathers were relegated to seats in the back of the bus.  This time, because I had finally started to see the trend, I was really appalled by this.

So, I started asking questions, as politely as possible.  Why is it only the mother?  Why are not both parents involved and recognized?

The answer I got from other youchien moms and the Director of the youchien: Because the dad is not really involved.  Wh-wh-wh-what?

Really? From the very beginning, the day of the opening ceremony, you treat the fathers like second-class citizens - literally being told to sit in the back of the room.  Is this not a self-fulfilling prophecy?  And what message does this send to the children about the roles of men and women in a family?

And the even sadder part of it is that the moms I spoke to, all smart, well-educated, women, did not even recognize it as odd.  It was simply the way it's always done.  Wowza.  My jaw still drops when I think about it.  This culture has some serious thinking to do; it is the year 2014 after all.

Ryan accepting his youchien diploma

Precision for 6 year olds:   The kids had practiced many times the "correct" way to accept the diploma from the principal - a very specific motion that included right hand outstretched first, left hand outstretched second, take hold of the certificate, draw it in towards the body at a 90 degree angle while taking one step backward, bow to the principal, then swivel on the right foot to turn 180 degrees, bow to the mom, and march the 10 steps to present the certificate to the mom (see above).  They looked a little like robots - but very, very cute robots - with rather serious and expressionless faces - except for Ryan, whose eye twinkle and upturned smile could not be hidden for long.

A short while later, after watching a tea ceremony, it occurred to me that this correct, precise way of accepting a kindergarten diploma also mirrored the precise, artistic, ritualistic motions of the age-old Japanese tea ceremony.  This made me feel a little better about it, but not entirely....

Ryan's Himawari (sunflower) class and all the parents

The graduation ceremony itself was a very sweet combination of the kids singing songs interspersed with each child saying/singing their own special line that they had written themselves about their 2 years at youchien.  Ryan was a rock star!

Higashine Elementary School Entrance Ceremonyにゅがくしき

Two days after returning from our China trip, Ryan had another big day!  The Higashine Elementary School Opening Ceremony on April (April 7, 2014).  At least we knew what to expect this time (and we knew we had to bring slippers this time).

Despite the fact that this was our SECOND opening ceremony and it is well known to be one of the most formal, celebrated events in Japanese life, somehow, Kevin seemed to think that it was OK not to wear a tie.  In a culture where everyone wears suits and ties alllllllll the time.  He tried to convince me that it was fine not to wear a tie, but no dice.  If Ryan had to wear a tie, so did he. I must admit, however, that the upside of this eleventh hour domestic dispute (literally as we walked out the door) was that it gave us something to do during the 1.5 hour long ceremony - namely to constantly scan the crowd to see if we could find anyone else not wearing a tie.  And in case you're wondering - I was right.

When we got to school, we had to find Ryan's name on the class list to find out which class he is in.  Ichi-nen, 2-kumi, Niwa-sensei.  He headed inside the school to his classroom and we made our way to the gymnasium (to sit in our assigned seats with all the other 1-2 family members).

The kids processed in, sat in the front with their class, listened to many, many, many congratulations from lots of different people.  They introduced the Higashine teachers and staff, and this was our first glimpse of Ryan's first grade teacher.  1)  She is tall - as in very tall. 2) She is new to the school, which is not surprising since they seem to transfer teachers like military hotcakes here), and 3) She was wearing PANTS!  As the only woman in the entire gymnasium wearing pants, I immediately liked her just for being different (and the irony is not lost on me with respect to Kevin and the tie situation).

This time the ceremony was a lot more fun - mostly because we were slightly less clueless than during Ethan's ceremony.  And Kevin and I both commented that we were pleasantly surprised that we could understand most, if not all, of the Principal's words to the incoming first-graders.  The fact that we consider it note-worthy/impressive that we could understand a speech intended for 6 year-olds is quite depressing, but alas...

This poor kid sitting next to Ryan didn't quite know what to make of Ryan's exuberance...

1-nen, 2-kumi - Niwa Sensei's class and all the parents

Higashine Elementary School will never be the same!

At the end of the ceremony, the kids processed out and then all the parents joined the kids in the classroom to receive their books, other assorted school supplies, and of course, the ichi-nensei yellow hats!

The Ichi-nensei Yellow Hat (and cherry blossoms in the schoolyard)

I looooove Ryan in his yellow hat!  It's so incredibly cute.  Ryan is now walking to and from school by himself. He and Ethan leave together, but from what I can tell, Ryan often leaves Ethan and his friends behind because "they walk too slow."

All SMILES walking to school on the first day.
And I wasn't too sad about not having to bike him to and from school every day either... win-win!

Learning to ride a bike

The boy is on a roll.  Just weeks after starting first grade, Ryan finally learned how to ride his bike without training wheels. So I had to make good on my promise to buy him a new bike...

Ryan and his new wheels

And even in learning to ride a bike, we discovered a cultural difference.  My friend, Iris, was visiting from the US and we were all helping Ryan practice riding a bike without training wheels.  When Iris, Kevin, or I helped him, we grabbed the back of the bike seat to hold it steady while running alongside Ryan as he pedaled.  Then one day, we were at the bike park and there were lots of Japanese parents also helping their kids learn to ride, as well as a Japanese-grandpa who worked at the bike park and was very invested in helping Ryan to learn.  The difference:  every Japanese person we saw helping a child learn to ride a bike grabbed the back of the child's shirt as they pedaled, not the bike seat.  I wonder how this happens in other countries... any comments from the peanut gallery as to how other countries do it?

Hajime no Kotoba (Opening Speech) at Ryan's First Undoukai

It was Ryan's first Undoukai and guess who was chosen to say the Opening Words in front of the whole school of 650 kids and all the parents?  Yep, the little first-grader American kid.  With a microphone.  On a raised platform.  In Japanese.  By memory.  We were quite proud.... 

To be honest, Ryan hadn't really made a big deal out of it and I didn't even realize what a big deal it was until one of my friends was asking him questions about it (in Japanese) and it suddenly became clear that this was a solo speaking part in front of everyone... Turns out that all the kids had to try out for the honor and Ryan was selected.

And Ethan had to share Undoukai with his little brother this year - and much to his dismay, Ryan's team (the white team) won!

My sweet Ethan at Undoukai 2014...

Starting Taiko

First grade brings lots of new opportunities.  Ryan recently joined the Meguro Bayashi Taiko Group - and he seems to be enjoying it.  Just a few weeks after he joined, the group performed at an all-school assembly at Higashine. Nothing like learning under pressure!

A little Lizzy Love...

Last week, it was a rainy Saturday and we were hanging out at home.  Lizzy was hanging out on the couch with Kevin and I was upstairs, when I hear, "Come quick, Lizzy is shedding!"  And this is what we saw - we were mesmerized.

Note:  As always, sorry for the delay.  After months of trying to resolve our iphoto spinning rainbow of death problems, we were finally able to rebuild the database last week.  Hope it was worth the wait!